Once upon a time, my issues had issues. What I have learned is that everything happens for a reason, for our good if we choose. We get to choose to play the victim or be the victor. With faith and better choices, we can fulfill our destiny regardless of unfair circumstances or situations. I am living proof.
Imagine a Latina woman with an MBA in the 1970’s working in a white male dominated Exxon. That was me, a trailblazer and poster child for the Equal Employment Opportunity Act. The men were angry that the government had imposed hiring practices to give minorities a chance for better jobs. Talk about a tough environment. Sexual harassment, racial slurs and more were the norm.
I scrambled up the corporate ladder and achieved 6 promotions in 11 years. Then one fateful, dreary day in Houston, my boss, Ray, called me into his corner office. As Ray doodled, he informed me he was blocking my seventh promotion. Stunned and dumbfounded, I asked why. He stated he did not like me. The world I knew imploded. I quit during a massive reorganization a few months later. Within a year — call it luck or grace — I was attending Harvard University to earn my second Masters. The devastating, demoralizing, humiliating experience of losing my spirit and soul at work became my launching pad to living a life of excellence and enjoying a fulfilling life.
What I considered punishment was simply preparation to doing the work I am passionate about today.
You, too, can live the life of your dreams. People do not have power over you, your thoughts and actions do. I wrote Spirited Leadership: 52 Ways to Build Trust – awarded International Latino Best Self-Help Book – to equip you to handle and embrace the inevitable challenges we all face. I want to share some of key messages.
Change your thoughts to change your world. We are 100% accountable for our lives. There is no “them.” Forgive instantly. Un-forgiveness keeps you stuck in the past and a victim. Your DNA, the stigmas or environment does not define you. Your choices do. Every choice counts! We are far more powerful than we imagine. If we have a chip on our shoulder, someone will try to knock it off. Get rid of the chip, you are made on purpose for a purpose. You were given unique talents, skills, attitudes and aptitudes that are meant to change the world for the better.
Learn to trust yourself by being true to your values and honoring yourself. As you honor yourself, you gain self-respect and the respect of others.Live your life from the inside out. Stop being driven by external validation, acceptance and society’s definition of success. Externals change in a heartbeat.
Redefine failure – there are none except not getting back up.
It is amazing how much energy and creativity you free up by living from the inside out. Live from your passion and purpose where there is no competition. You are meant for greatness!
I hope these learnings make your lives easier, brighter and lighter!
Ellen Castro, Chief Energizing Officer, is a best-selling author, exhilarating speaker, global consultant and trusted coach. Connect with Ellen at www.EllenCastro.com.
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